Top Gun (1986)

This week I made up for a blind spot in my cinematic history.  I saw Top Gun for the first time.  Yes, I think I'm the only child of the 80's who hadn't seen it yet.  Oh, I knew all about it.  I knew Goose died.  I knew that it was packed with terrible 80's music.  I knew he traveled the highway to the dangerzone.  And I'd seen practically every scene at some time in my life.  But I had never actually seen the whole thing from start to finish.

And now that I have I feel confident in saying this: Top Gun is a fairly bad movie.  The story is forgettable, giving no real reason to care about either the characters or the "Top Gun" competition.  The music is horrible and dates the film rather badly.  The editing is among the worst ever, as the film makers tried to use stock footage of the jets to fit their story, with the result that often an F14 that is supposed to be behind the MIG is for a moment pictured in front of it.  And there are plenty of little editing issues like that.

But the biggest issue by far is the acting.  I swear, when Tom Cruise was acting all broken up that Goose had died I thought I'd have to fast forward.  Either that, or use a spoon to induce vomiting.  Honestly, I have no idea why Cruise made such a big splash about that era in Hollywood -the man had as much talent for acting as a cat has talent for singing (thankfully he has improved at least a bit).

So what we are left with is bluster, posture, and a bit of awkward charm, all set to music we'd prefer to forget ever existed.  Oh, and those actors had NO idea how to play volleyball.

Entertainment: 5/10
Artistic value: 3/10
Technical merit: 4/10

Overall: 4/10

P.S. I wonder how many young men signed up for the navy thinking they'd be in Top Gun, and ended up swabbing the deck for 4 years?